The Only Angel
by Aqua Alta
Summary: My own version of Chapter 33. My first Furuba fic. Will Tohru be able to heal Kyou's wounded heart? Who is she to him? Kyou's POV.


_THE ONLY ANGEL_

**Author's Note:**

**Yeah, my first Fruits Basket fic. Just read the manga, though. Can someone tell me which is better: Tohru with Kyou or Tohru with Yuki?**

**Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own Fruits Basket! And please forgive some mistakes and OOC-ness! I just read a volume of Fruits Basket and that was the sixth!**

She has seen it.

I leap as far as I can from her. Why did sensei do this! I don't have enough courage to glance back at her. She must be filled with fear right now. Perhaps she is even vomiting. I know that this cursed body of mine let out an overwhelming stink.

I am a monster.

_Since when have I been too familiar with your smile?_

_Even I forget the truth I am facing all the time_

_This curse of mine will never let me go, never_

_I don't wanna see your expression when you find out about this_

I run away. Again. It is all over now. Everything I have with her has vanished into dust. I have no one now. I am all alone.

Even when my Mom died, I have never felt so alone like this.

_Running won't solve anything, yet there's nothing_

_To be solved anyway, so I guess it's just okay_

_I have taken the risk too far this time, too far_

_I am proved that I am wrong about my choice when I see you_

As I think about her, dashing all the way, I can feel hot tears running down my cheeks.

I am a fool to have hope in her. It is just like what happened with Mom. She always said sweet things, yet she never proved that they were true at all. She did nothing. Only those words.

I hate it! Why should everybody act like they care about me even though they don't! Do I look pathetic to them! Do I look so desperate for help!

_It is all there, the fear and sick feeling in your eyes_

_Perhaps it is better if we never have met at all_

'_Cause once again, I've disappointed the person I love the most_

_When you see my true form right before your eyes_

_I know that I have lost the only angel I have ever known_

I've lost her now. And I'm not going to get her back. She won't dare to meet me again, not after she has known my true form.

I hope that rat makes her happy.

_Again, I run away, this time never intends to come back_

_I have hurt too many people by my presence only_

_I've experienced this too many times before, right?_

_There should be no differences, but why am I crying right now?_

I don't care about her, do I?

Why am I crying because of her? What is happening to me!

Why do I always hurt all the people I love!

What am I!

_I stop in desperation, unable to continue to run _

_There you are, standing in front of me_

_I always try to hurt you, to make you go away_

_I don't deserve you, not even once in a mere second_

I stops to catch my breath. The rain is falling now. Great, just like what I need.

And then, suddenly she is there, standing next to me.

_It is all there, the fear and sick feeling in your eyes_

_Perhaps it is better if we never have met at all_

'_Cause once again, I've disappointed the person I love the most_

_When you see my true form right before your eyes_

_I know that I have lost the only angel I have ever known_

"What are you doing here!" I bark at her, wincing at how different my voice is. "Go away! Can't you see my hideous appearance! Can't you smell the rotten air around me!"

Kami-sama, she is crying in front of me. I really wish I can wipe those tears away.

_You are afraid, aren't you? You think I am disgusting, right?_

_Then why are you still here, staying with me?_

_Why won't you simply let go of this cursed creature?_

_As I cry, I am begging you to tell me why_

Tears are running on my cheeks too. She grabs my front leg, or my arm; I don't care. "No!" she cries. "I won't go. Please…."

"GO AWAY!" I scream at her, pushing her away roughly. My claws scratch her shoulder, and I think my heart has stopped beating at that moment.

I have hurt her.

Her eyes are wide in shock. "You are just annoying me, you know!" I shout. I lie…. I lie…. I lie. "Why don't you just disappear or go away from my sight!"

"_Just give up," my mouth says "You shouldn't be here"_

_However, my heart is pleading for you to stay forever_

_Forever by my side_

I wish I can just die right on my spot as I watch her leave slowly. She keep glancing back at me, as if trying to say something, to do something.

I turn my head away from her, not wanting to see her crying as the last scene I see from her.

I really wish I can see her smiling that smile of hers just one more time.

_You are the only angel I have ever known_

_You cry along with me, as if feeling my pain too_

_What have I done that I deserve you?_

_I never thought that anyone could be so stupid_

_That they would say this to me:_

"_We'll live forever together."_

And that it happens, all in a blur. I don't know how, but in a sudden she is hugging my arm tightly, as if afraid to let go. "Please, Kyou-kun…," she sobs. "I am afraid of you. You look so different. Even your voice sounds different. But I promise, I promise that one day I will accept the reality! Please, I beg to you…."

I freeze. Am I dreaming?

"Let me stay. We can do all the things I have hoped we could do together. We can study together, chat together, go to school together, everything!"

I try to shut her out. No…, not those sweet words again. This is just like Mom….

"Please, we will live together…forever…"

That is it. My tears are now streaming uncontrollably.

All the control I have is now gone.

_I cry into your hair, calling out your name in a desperate nature_

What have I done that I deserve her, actually?

I seize her wrist firmly and rather roughly, my thoughts hazy.

I thought no one could be as stupid as her.

I pull her into my embrace, clinging onto her body as strong as I can. I am afraid to lose this moment. Even though if it is not real.

I used not to believe that someone would say this to me: _"We'll live together forever…."_

As I sob into her smooth hair, I whisper her name over and over again. Once, twice, thrice….

I don't want to stop.

As I press my lips onto hers, the reality is not around anymore. My mind is screaming to me to stop it, yet my heart simply doesn't allow me to break apart from her.

I know that perhaps I will only hurt her even more. But this irrational act of mine has a reason, a very rational reason.

_Because you are the only angel I have ever known…_

THE END

**I nearly cried when I wrote this. I really love this scene! BTW, the lyric is mine. It is called 'The Only Angel' and I wrote it for Kyou. What do you think? And sorry for the lame kissing. That's my first kissing scene.**

**R&R please!**

_Celon Ierith _

4


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